As I have said I will think of all words if I live long enough to say how I feel about my father's time with us. Irreplaceable is just one that might take the rest of the night to explain how it applies to one man but if there was a short list this would be near the top of such words. I will give a few examples of why this has to be recognized.
My father retired from the United States Marine Corps mid 1978. Upon his decision to retire the USMC made offers for my father to stay on board. Among the offers was a promotion to Lieutenant Colonel. The down side of that was yet another move of the family to far away place and it would also not be a permanent home. In the meantime the USMC was busy trying to find a man or anyone to take my father's place. The USMC used it's best abilities to find someone to include utilizing the cutting edge computer systems at MCTSSA in Camp Pendleton. The only name that ever came back after entering my dad's qualifications was his very own. As far as I know the Marines never really replaced him. I think that says quite a bit. Even the United States Marine Corps could not replace Major Robert M. Walker.
When my dad passed away so unexpectedly it became evident that another vacuum formed over the people he worked with in defense contracting. Administrators from various contractors had immediately expressed concern that there would be no one to take up where he left off. My father is lauded for his brilliance and the uncanny ability to look through complexities to find simple answers. His 23 years in the USMC and his 33 years specializing in the absolute leading edge of technologies to include "rocket science" put him in a very unique position. Even though his value was seemingly so extreme he never beat his chest to the contractors or the government expecting something more. I don't think he underestimated himself. I just think he was easily satisfied with what he was awarded. In the last month I have heard again that he will not likely be replaced and that the best that can be done is several people will have to step into his role to get the job done.
At home what else can be said. To write this part off as Dad being irreplaceable is unacceptable. There are many more words to cover as it applies to his legacy out here. There is definitely a hole in the family and in our hearts. It is so unreal that he is gone and never another word will be spoken to him nor any from him. How sweet a sound it will be to hear him again. His heart was full and I suppose will always be. I am just one man that was raised in his home and there are more people who could share so much more than I could. I hope the family does do the one thing Dad seemed to care about most and that is to grow closer together.
I promise I will do my best.
I had my first dream about Dad last night. He was sitting at his computer in the home office, with photos of all of his family on top if it screen, on the printer, along the sides and on the table. Dozens of pictures. I didn't particularly like the photos of me, thought they were out of place and odd. On his left, I bent down and put my arm around him, gave him a firm hug and a kiss on the head and said "I love you. Goodbye." Then I collapsed on the floor crying realizing that it's all over.
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