To begin I have to note that November 25th is the wedding anniversary of my parents. Unfortunately my father will not be here to celebrate their 45th year together. My guts have stayed in a high pitched angst every day since his passing and I cannot as yet think of anything to do which does not remind of Dad somehow.
My frequent travels on the roads to places near and far were all somehow related to my father. Nothing looks or feels the same anymore Now when I go out the sky is a different color. The air smells different and everything is heavy. I think Our Creator is trying to talk to me and I want to hear Him more than ever.
Maybe this is the final plane we step up onto in our flesh where we separate ourselves from the rest of the world. This may be where one truly seeks and clearly finds. I feel something huge under my feet but letting go 100% and allowing The Lord to work in my life is a battle for which my Dad helped me prepare in more ways than even he knew. I still feel very unsure about it.
When you pray tonight please pray for my mother. This passing anniversary is painful for her as will be the next anniversary and every anniversary. Every day she will face without the one that had spent 45 years becoming the man of her dreams. Now that the beautiful dream is over if she could just take each step with peace and understanding.
I love you Mom!
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